The Journey: #56 Not on My Watch

When I was an IC, I was scared to create boundaries and stand up for myself.

I took the stance that the customer was always right, which meant it was my job to take whatever came my way and figure out how to navigate it. I absorbed frustration and swallowed comments. I told myself it was just part of the job.

As I matured in my Customer Success career and found myself navigating more and more of these situations, I learned

when and how to draw a line.

I’ll never forget the worst one.

It happened after a platform outage.

The company handled it well. We were transparent, communicated quickly, shared a root cause analysis, a clear timeline to resolution, and safeguards to prevent it from happening again. Solid damage control and future risk mitigation if you ask me.

Not ideal, obviously. But we work in tech, and sometimes things happen.

After the company-wide communication went out, I personally reached out to all of my customers and offered time to get on a call to walk through what happened and answer questions.

Most appreciated the outreach, but since there wasn’t a major impact and everything was resolved, they didn’t feel the need to meet.

But there was one customer. Because there is always one.

They booked a meeting for the same day. I hadn’t had issues with this account before, but the person who booked the call was someone I’d never worked with. Very senior. EVP level.

I joined the call, started introducing myself, and he cut me off mid-sentence.

“I don’t give a f**k who you are.”

And that set the tone.

For seven minutes straight, he screamed at me. He made threats, demands and personal attacks. He was calling me incompetent and telling me how unacceptable this was.

I’ll never forget that call as long as I live. His words cut deep.

At some point, I couldn’t hold it together anymore. I started crying.

And he said, “Great. Why don’t you get a grown-up on the call to help me.”

After the call, I told my boss what happened. He looked at me and said, “You should have just hung up.”

That meeting is one of those you replay a hundred times in your head. All the things you wish you’d said. All the moments you wish you’d handled differently.

But here’s what I know for sure. No customer ever crossed that line with me again. That moment permanently changed how I showed up.

And when I became a leader, I knew I had a responsibility to make sure no one on my team ever felt the way I did on that call.

Very explicitly, my team needed to know three things.

1. Behavior like that will never be tolerated

2. You will never get in trouble for setting boundaries with a customer

3. If a customer disrespects you, pull me in immediately

As a leader, it is my job to protect my team and ensure they never find themselves in a hostile work environment, whether that behavior comes from inside the company or from customers, partners, or vendors.

So here’s what I’ve done to make that crystal clear for my teams and for our customers.

How I set expectations internally and externally:

1. We explicitly talk about boundaries during onboarding and team meetings

2. I give my team language they can use in the moment to pause or reset a conversation

3. We normalize escalating early, not pushing through abuse

4. I personally step in when a line is crossed, every time

5. We reinforce that professionalism goes both ways. Respect is not optional.

Customer-first does not mean self-sacrificing and empathy does not mean endurance. Great Customer Success does not come at the expense of psychological safety.

Not on my watch.